what a difference a few years makes....

I have been thinking a lot recently about how Christmas has changed for us over the last five years. Five years ago Christmas, we were in the middle of trying to get pregnant with M. I was so upset that I wasn't pregnant yet - I could not wait to have a child. Looking back, it was such a short wait for us. We were lucky (really lucky, as I have a pretty strong family history of infertility issues) it was only 5 months of trying until we were pregnant - but I remember that December was so awful. And I was a mess....
A year later, M. was almost 2 months old at Christmas. I was on my 3 month maternity leave. My parents and my brother came to our place for Christmas Eve and Day. I remember us opening presents - and M. had more than anyone else. We only got her 1 toy from Santa - she didn't need a thing - but between family and church members and such, she had a huge pile of gifts that we all opened for her. I have a wonderful picture of that Christmas of my parents and brother sitting on the couch in our (old) living room holding M. - that was our last Christmas before my parents separated. Looking back, it is bittersweet.
The next year, my parents were separated and we drove up to the city where they live after Christmas to see them. It was the first time we visited my mom in her new apartment, and I remember walking in the door and practically running to the bathroom and locking myself in and just bawling. My parents' separation and eventual divorce hit me like a ton of bricks. And yet that was a really fun Christmas - M. was a toddler and so sweet about opening presents and just found joy in everything. This was also the year of 12 inches of snow on December 23 and another 14 on Christmas Eve. We canceled Christmas Eve services because of the weather and bitter, bitter cold and W. made a good start on earning sainthood by shoveling my car out of our driveway, which was off an alley that also had to be shoveled out, so we could get to see my parents.
The next year was our last before moving out here. We again went to see my parents after Christmas. This year was easier for me emotionally. We had a good time with my dad's family at his house. I remember specifically my cousin's husband, who is a PCA pastor, telling us we probably wouldn't like to live in Utah because of the LDS environment. He had a friend who lived in Salt Lake doing ministry for 2 years and his friend hated it. It's interesting to see the difference one's theology and worldview make - we really like it here, but we're not convinced we have to convert the state to be successful - which is the ministry model this cousin and his friend share. (far too much stress for me, but that's another post) This was also a really fun Christmas with M. - at 2 she was even more excited about giving gifts and had fun playing with her second cousins at Grandpa's house.
Last year, we had our first Christmas in Utah. I was pregnant with C., and getting really tired of people asking if I thought I would make it to my due date. (I am 5'4", W. is 6'4". I am short-waisted, and our babies are tall. They have no where to go but out - and so I got really big bellies both times. This is just how it is, and the constant questioning from people who should have just kept their mouths shut really got to me. Can you tell?) M. was old enough to really help with some baking and wrapping and such, which was fun. I felt mentally frazzled trying to get ready for a baby and for Christmas at the same time. And it was hard to be so far from family and not see any of my family for Christmas. W's mom came out 2 days after Christmas to visit, though, so we did get to see some family.
This year, I am thankful that C. has not yet started pulling ornaments off the tree. (we put the tree up on Friday) She is into everything these days. I am looking forward to Christmas morning - watching the girls open presents will be fun. I am sad that none of my family can be here - but, we can't really travel to them easily either. And my mil is coming again right after Christmas. And my mom is coming in January (to house-hunt - she is moving here in February/March - again, another post) And I am feeling more settled.
And, I am passing on baby stuff. The majority of the baby stuff we have is stuff we were given. We are pretty sure we are done with babies, and our church is buying Christmas presents for about 10 moms and their kids at a meth recovery group home - and 3 of those kids are babies who have very, very little. And so, in between finishing up shopping and wrapping and mailing cards this week, I am sorting baby clothes and such - giving thanks for my babies, remembering the Baby of the season, thinking of those waiting for their own babies, and praying for all those babies who have so little in this world, and feeling a chapter of my life closing. Joy, hope, love, peace - my Christmas will have all of those. And I pray, and I fold little outfits and bag them up, that they will bring the same to the moms and babies who receive.

Conversations at our house this morning

Just because it's funny looking back.....

Me: M., do you want pancakes for breakfast?

M: No, Mommy. Pancakes are messy. I want something else.

Me: Okay, what do you want?

M: Cream of Wheat. It's not messy. (not entirely true, as she is apt to spill down her shirt as she eats, but I'm willing to indulge this wish...)

Me: Okay. Let's go get it out.

M: Mommy, I want to get the box out of the cupboard. I can do it.

Me: Okay. (I am not about to stop someone being independent and helpful)

M: Here Mommy. Oops.

(At this point I look down at the floor where about 3/4 cup of dry cream of wheat has spilled out to the box - it looks like a little indoor snowstorm or something)

Me: M, we have to remember not to tip the box because it will spill. Let's get the vacuum out. (I am calm because I actually got a good night's sleep last night - makes all the difference in the world in my level of patience with stuff like this.)

M: Oh. Okay.

(I get out the vacuum, we clean up the mess. I start cooking the cream of wheat and put the box back. I stir the cream of wheat on the stove and then turn to look down at C., who has decided that she wants to get things out of the cabinet too. She is trying to chew through a wrapper around some crackers, and has spilled guess what - more cream of wheat on the floor.)

Me: time for the vacuum again.

(W. walks into the kitchen and looks around)

W: Girls are messy. Everyone talks about boys being messy, but girls are messy.

Me: The two are not mutually exclusive, you know.

W: (chuckles and leaves to walk the dog)

We are going to try to get the tree up and decorated today. If we're all still in a good mood after that, we're going to go downtown on the train and see the lights. M and C love, love, love to ride the train, so that in itself is a treat. Hope you all are having fun. Oh, and the cream of wheat was pretty yummy.....

27 words for snow

I remember hearing somewhere that the Inuit language (I think that's right) has 27 words for snow. I may have the number wrong, but it is close. I now understand why. We have had snow almost daily since last Friday night. There has been heavy snowfall, light snowfall, big fluffy flakes, little flakes that looked almost like someone had spraypainted them on everything, and more. We got more flurries tonight. Snow, snow, snow. And while it's beautiful, bundling up 2 little girls to the hilt every time we leave the house and continually scraping off the car is starting to get a bit old. Oh well, last July I was complaining about it being over 100 for seemingly weeks on end. At least we have variety here....

C's new tricks

We have a climber. Some shots from the last 24 hours.....

First, it was just fun to climb up on her sister's chair. She would sit there on her knees and laugh and smile. Cute, right? (Until she stands up and my heart stops beating for a second...)
Then she figured out how to go from the chair to the coffee table. The keyboard is an old one that stopped working, so we cut the cord off and made it M's when M was about 2 or so. C. now loves to "type" on it....

Looking to see if she has an audience. And waiting for Mom or Dad to come get her down.
Finally, this isn't the best picture, but didn't these shoes for C. turn out cute? I made them yesterday and I think they turned out pretty neat. They are made of a rosy-pink wool felt...to keep her toes nice and warm this winter - or at least until she outgrows them!

ETA - a link to the pattern I found for the shoes - in case anyone reading wants to make a pair. They aren't hard to sew, and I used gripper fabric (think what's on the soles of kids footie pajamas) for the sole, to make them non-slip, instead of leather.

Catching Up

Much has been going on - not all bloggable. As of last Thursday, the session at W's church officially voted to ask me to serve as a parish associate there - so I am looking forward to getting into that more in January. I'll be working with children's and adult's c.e. first - helping to bring some order and planning to those programs that currently have none. Should be good.
On the parish associate note, W. has been teaching an adult Sunday School class this fall using the book Journey Through the Word. Those who have been in the class said last Sunday they want to keep going in January and study the socio-political context of the first century - the background of the New Testament. Anyone know of any not too academic resources for this study? We're looking for a book they can read and discuss together with limited help from W. or me as we both have other responsibilities on Sunday morning. All suggestions are welcome.
Presbytery council has hired the person I thought/hoped they would for the temporary executive. I think this will be good - she will do a good job. I'm still considering whether I'd be interested in the permanent position in another 2 years or so - we shall see.
Finally, some recent pictures........This is M. making playdough...our living room rug may never recover, but that's okay....

M. working on her website - we love starfall.com - a great site that teaches a phonics-based reading program and is intuitive enough for kids to do on their own.

Our turkey cookies - M. saw the Pi!lsbury ad with a picture for these in it and wanted to make them - she was quite proud of how they turned out.


And last but not least, my family cooking dinner. W. made grilled ham and cheese sandwiches tonight. M. buttered the bread (and licked the butter knife). C. tried to climb the stool again and get underfoot. The sandwiches were quite good. I think the picture is even better.

Yogurt for dinner

So, one of C.'s favorite foods is yogurt - plain, whole milk yogurt (babies need fat in their diet the first two years for optimal brain development, so no low-fat stuff - and I try really hard to avoid artificial flavors before about 18 months, so plain it is....) She loves this stuff - and also loves trying to feed herself with the spoon. So, we usually use at least 2 spoons - one for her and one for me. Until she grabs both.....




She spent a good 10 minutes or so waving those spoons around, laughing and talking to us, and smearing yogurt all over. Yogurt is fun to fingerpaint with, did you know that? And fingerpainting is good for all sorts of things like developing fine motor skills and creativity and such - so this is really educational.....and fun for mom to clean up......

10 Things about me....

So, More Cows tagged me for this almost a week ago, and I'm finally getting around to typing up my list to post. So, here goes....

10 Random Things about me....

1. In the last year and a half, as I've adjusted to being a stay-at-home mom, I have rediscovered a love of sewing. I now have a sewing machine that does more than I understand how to do (it's a Babylock - and I would highly recommend the brand if you're looking...) and have made a number of things, from Halloween costumes to pants and turtlenecks for M., to matching sundresses for M. and C. last summer.
2. Echoing More Cows and Jon, I also have double-jointed fingers, and yes, I've had them lock in weird ways during both communion and benedictions.
3. I did college in 3 years and seminary in 4 - reversing the standard timetables. My seminary experience was definitely good - I spent the 4th year doing a full-time internship that changed my ideas about what sort of ministry I was called to in very helpful ways. Not sure if doing college in 3 years was all for the best, but what's done is done.....
4. My living room rug has small bits of various colored playdough dried onto it. I'm still trying to figure out if I should put lots of energy into getting these up, or just budget to buy a new rug when M. and C. outgrow the playdough age.
5. I don't really enjoy exercise, but have found I feel much better and have much more patience when I exercise regularly - so I try to do it anyway.
6. I really love being home with my girls full-time - even though I am regularly exhausted emotionally and physically and I never get to really "leave work" I wouldn't trade these years for anything. And I'm grateful that I'm both a mother and staying at home because I chose this - unlike many women I've met who have had these experiences but didn't choose them freely.
7. I love to cook as well, and especially with my 4 year old M. - who expresses sheer delight and amazement at the processes of cooking and baking - making the whole experience much more fun.
8. I have a terrible sweet tooth - the amount of Halloween candy I've consumed in the last week is shameful.
9. I wasn't too fond of dogs growing up until I met W.'s family's dog, Mugsy, a German Shephard/husky mix who was the best and friendliest dog on the planet, unless you happened to be driving a UPS truck. Mugsy won my heart, and W's and my first "furbaby" was our dog Micah. We also have 3 cats - all of whom I also love.
10. I am seriously considering homeschooling my daughters for a number of reasons which I should blog about in the future, including a belief that human beings should not be mass produced, a concern about both the quality and social environment of the public schools, and a growing realization that M. at least is quite gifted and unlikely to fit in well to a traditional classroom environment. The more I consider this as time goes by, the less it scares me. I continue to have mixed views about homeschooling in general - but it may be the best thing for my kiddos - and I am a true momma bear about my kiddos - I would do just about anything for them and I will growl quite loudly at anyone who is after them.